This is me; little Julie Jean

"I'll be home for Christmas; if only in my dreams..."

(our hospital room tree :)



-The eve of Christmas Eve-
 

It was the night before Christmas Eve and all through the hospital not a patient was stirring, except for me.   ;)  My husband is sleeping in the recliner next to my bed and I'm wide awake.  It's really late.  My body feels exhausted, but my mind won't stop thinking.  So I'm writing a post. :)

My husband arrived yesterday!!!! :D  He'll be with me through Christmas and I am a very happy girl.  He brought with him a Christmas tree, from his mom, and presents!  So our room is nice and festive right now!  And we'll actually get to open gifts on Christmas morning! :)

Today was a long day.  My husband left early to go to a football game with his dad and brothers.  I'm so glad they got to go!  They had fun.  And I spent the day crocheting, eating, taking meds, eating, facebooking, eating, skyping, and eating. ;)  Yes, sometimes that's all I feel I do is EAT!  But I have to gain around 20 more pounds, I believe, to fit the requirements of a lung transplant.  So I'm trying my hardest!  Eating during the day and having tube feedings through my mic-key button at night.  And, hey, I think it's working too.  Today they weighed me and I had gained four pounds since Wednesday, the day I arrived again at the hospital.  And last month, in the fiasco of almost dying and needing to be vented for 11 days (Okay, I will probably eventually write another post explaining that entire November experience someday) I had lost around 15 pounds... and since then I've gained almost the whole 15 back.  I'd say that's progress for one month's work!! :D  I can do this.  ;)

After the game, Joe's dad and brothers visited me for a while.  It was so nice to see them!  And they all looked super cute in the masks they had to wear to enter the room.  ;)  I got pictures too!  Of course, I am quite the picture taker.  It was very sweet of them, though.  Joe and I are lucky to have such a wonderful family.

(the guys)

Speaking of beautiful family... my heart did break a little today. While talking with one of my sisters over skype one of my little nephews asked, "Julie, are you going to be home for Christmas?" I frowned, shook my head, and said, "No, love..." His face sunk and he was quiet.  He looked so sad.  I was like, "Oh, baby, I'm sorry... I miss you and love you!"  He answered, "I love you..." then walked away slowly.  They're always asking me when I'll get to come over next and telling me they miss me.  I miss them too!  I want to give them all bear hugs.  Oh, I miss my family!

Since then the lyrics, "I'll be home for Christmas, if only in my dreams..." have been running through my head.  It makes me miss everyone; then I realized not only in my dreams, but in my heart I am home for Christmas.  We'll still get to see everyone through skype and I'm sure Joe and I will make the day very special together.  So, cheer up, Julie Jean. ;)

 My respiratory therapist just came in and gave me my breathing treatments.  We chatted.  He was so very sweet.  He said something that really touched my heart; and made me laugh a little.  "Here's an old farmer's saying... that I made up: 'There's the way you dream your life will be, then there's the way your life is.  Some people have all their dreams comes true, and are miserable.  Others get kicked down over and over and over again, and yet still smile.  It depends on what you do with what you got.  You have to decide to be happy however you life is.  Smile now; this is your life.'"  Good self quote, Mr. RT, good quote!  Then he added, "God bless you for your positive attitude."  Our chat made me smile. :)

So happy Christmas Eve, peoples!  Hug your loved ones closely.  Smile.  Be cheeful that you are with them.  And if you are far from the ones you love, call them and let them know how much you care.  It could mean the world to them; and I'm sure will bring you joy too.  I love you, dear family.  I love you, my fantastic friends.  To all those near and far, may God bless you over this special holiday of our Lord Savior's birth.
              Now, my yawns are getting more frequent and I can feel my eyes drifting.  I think it is time for me to snuggle in my bed, hold my husband's hand, and fall fast asleep.  Praying I have a small Christmas Eve miracle tomorrow and my breathing test goes well.  Muah!

(me and my love)

Hugs; and a kiss under the mistletoe,            

                                                            ~Julie Jean